Sick Sentences

At writing time we have been looking at Sick Sentences and trying to make them better. This week our Sick Sentences were "There were rows of seats. Cobwebs covered the walls. It was cold in the room". We talked about how there were no wow words in these sentences, and thought that we could make them better by adding more detail, wow words and a simile. First, we worked independently to fix the sentences, then we shared our ideas. Finally, we chose our favourite parts of the sentences that we had come up with to fix the sick sentences as a class. This is what we came up with. Let us know what you think. Did we make the sentence better?